Change of speed

What is my current speed? FAST!

I thought I was busy before, but now I am super busy. Maybe I can take on the label of being a super-mom? Only with the help of my amazing husband am I able to continue to work my full-time job and go to school (part-time, of course).

I feel so blessed that I am able to get back into, college that is. After losing Elijah, I felt like my life was so worthless and pointless. I needed to do something with myself because, frankly, I was becoming a little lazy.

I am taking up two different economics classes: micro and macro. One is online and the other on-campus. They are both with the same professor, which is why I registered for both. I was initially going to just take one class to "get my feet wet", so to speak, but I really wanted one more. So when I saw the second open up, with the same professor, I immediately thought it was a great benefit because I wouldn't have to struggle with different styles and personalities. Just one.

Though the concepts seem simple enough; it's the math I am stumbling over. Which is very odd for me, considering my weird love for math (I kept my college algebra and pre-calc book to work problems out of it for "fun"). Hey! Don't judge me. Maybe I am thinking into it too much. Another thing I think I am digging a hole in on my online discussion boards. I ramble on too much; taking a very simple concept and twist it until it becomes my own. Not to mention it is wrong. I got called out on it; and yes, he did have a valid point, but I had dug myself so far into complexity I was still stubborn in thinking I was right. So I commented back; I am still right (even though I know deep down, I am wrong but can't admit it). Whatever.

My life always moved at the speed of busy. Even though I have added two more plates to my table, I don't feel any more stressed (or so not yet). I am looking forward to the change of priorities. The number one I am going to miss the most though is spending time with my husband and son. Yet, again like I have mentioned before, I am putting myself through all of this to better OUR quality of life. Elijah is not here with me, and I want him to be so much, but he can't. So I have to live the best life I possibly can in honor of his life that had been taken away so soon.

Last week, my husband and I attended a funeral visitation for the youngest person we know (aside from our own Elijah's). His name was Peter; a tiny little teacher. He was 6 years old and ever-so the cutest boy. Many on you who have followed Elijah's story may remember how we came to know him in the way we do. Mary Kellett; founder of Prenatal Partner's for Life. I was so desperate to find anyone who would help save my little boy and Mary was the only one who would listen. In fact, she pushed me to listen. I was in a dark deep world and she helped me to cope. Because of Mary, she put us in touch with Sustaining Grace; who gave us the gift of 3D/4D ultrasound and a teddy to hold his heartbeat.

It was Mary's little boy, Peter, that had passed away. I was so upset, knowing what an amazing woman she is in taking care of her own 11 children and all the families and mothers that come to her for support in their own child loss. She is amazing.

Mary had asked us to stay and speak so that her friends and family could she just exactly what it is that Prenatal Partners for Life actually does. I did... through my tears and nervousness of public speaking... I did. For her.

So in closing, I want all my friends and family, to now turn your prayers towards Mary and her family as they go down their own path of sorrow.

Peter's life was short; but he has already accomplished so much. He gave me the opportunity to know my son, Elijah.

His work is just getting started...

For more information, please visit www.prenatalpartnersforlife.org and www.sustaininggrace.org or visit them on Facebook.

Please consider donating (or sending memorials to Mary) to keep Peter's, Elijah's, and Grace's legacies live on.