Waiting Game

So yesterday I was tested for preclampsia at Centracare and then meet with our original OB, whom we will be transferring our of her care and into Abbott's instead. By no fault of her own, it's just how the cards were dealt given our recent situation. Sucks. I was really looking forward to her being my OB and delivery my second child; she delivered Paighton by chance. I enjoy her a lot.

I do not have preclampsia. So that is good news. My first pregnancy I never did have any issues with high blood pressure, or protein in the urine (I know, sounds gross huh?). I did however have issues with gestational diabetes, kind of. I would fail, then pass, then fail, then pass. It kept going on in a circle. I was never officially diagnosed or treated; was told just to watch my sugar/carb intake and balance my diet with more protein. Hence my cravings for peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (on wheat), chocolate soy milk and strawberries. I always had some kind of nuts within my reach and I found these 'Belly Bars' in the vitamin aisle; they were a good quick snack when I could feel blood sugar level drop. I am unsure if I am having any gestational diabetes issues with this pregnancy, I have not been tested yet. I am unsure if I even will be. I don't know really. I will be monitored often and closely for preclampsia though, as that seems to be the biggest risk right now; second to having a miscarriage.

I did ask about my 3 week going on 4 week headache. There is nothing they can do about that since the Tylenol or Percocet doesn't help any. I could take a migraine prescription, but it has not been deemed "safe" for pregnant women yet. Since I am continuing my pregnancy, I want to take all precautions seriously. I am just going to stick to my lavender baths and darkened spaces when needed. Now only if I could find a really awesome masseuse for free. My husband whines too much, probably because I critique him while he is doing it. Ah, the joys of marriage. I wouldn't change it though; my life would be too boring without him.

Next step is transferring all my care to Abbott. Tuesday, the 20th, we will be meeting with one of the nurses at Abbott to do that, then right after we will be meeting again with the Geneticist from last Wednesday's ordeal, not the previous one from April 1st. She will talk more about what we can expect and hopefully set up more appointments to meet with the neonatal people and the NICU at Children's Hospital.

Today we tried focusing on just being a normal married couple with a normal pregnancy. We went out for lunch at Noodles N Company (yum) then went price shopping for fencing out part of our yard at HOM Depot, Menard's and Fleet Farm. I think Menard's was the cheapest for what we want. I wanted to get a caramel cooler from Caribou afterwards, but the hubby was too full from lunch. So we just went home.

I made my first hot dish ever! Well, actually my first hot dish as a mommy. I have made one or two before, but since Paighton has been born and diagnosed with milk, egg, and nut allergies, I just haven't been confident enough to venture into the land of hot dishes. Most hot dishes I know growing up always needs milk, or creme, or some kind of cream of chicken/celery/mushroom soup. I recently discovered that Campbell's makes a Golden Mushroom soup *queue in heavenly music and lights signing down into my kitchen* What a miracle! Since my recent discovery, my slow cooker meals have been better, and my chow mein hot dish tonight was AWESOME! It reminded me of how my mom's hotdish is, almost exactly alike. I think it could have used more pepper, and I was sadly out of soy sauce. It needed that as well...

Tomorrow I am excited to try Panko for the first time. I have been dabbling a little in marinating chicken breasts a day or two before baking them. In the past I have used crushed ritz or townhouse crackers, or those french fried onions for breading. I decided to read the label on Panko (breadcrumbs, in the ethnic or Asian aisle, depending on how your store is set up). I am really excited to see how it turns out. I even think Paighton enjoys his mommy experimenting more in the kitchen, even the hubby.

I could probably go on and on about cooking. I am getting better at it, and never want to stop trying new ideas. Only thing I don't like is Paighton hanging off the oven door handle trying to see what Mommy is doing. That, or he pulls the drawer out below the oven, and pinches my big toe under it. One of these days he is going to take off some skin. Talk about ouch!

So now that my husband and I have made a final decision about our unborn baby, and we feel relieved knowing God answered our prayers and took away the responsibility of making the "other" decision, we feel a whole lot better about things. I don't seem so upset about talking about things, although I am sad. Sure, of course I am . But I am not going to be sad until the sad time comes. Right now I am happy, feeling, and fighting against the many strong kicks and punches my baby throws at me. He is so feisty!

I had originally planned on going back to work next Monday, but since I am not meeting with any Abbott doctors til Tuesday, doesn't look like that is going to happen. I am so bummed. I miss work, really. I know that sounds weird, but I work for an awesome company and have many awesome co-workers that have become close friends. It is also a place of serenity for me. A place to get away from being mommy and wifey, and do my own thing. I also missed Earth Day [insert tear here]. I LOVE Earth Day. I even signed up to volunteer for 2 days instead of one like I did last year. I wanted to run the 5K this year, but found out I was pregnant, so I signed up for my normal water stop instead. I enjoy watching people run, how hard they are working for the greater good of not only Earth but themselves. Some people train for a long time to reach their goals. It makes me feel good to see them feel good about themselves. Even though they look like they are in a lot of pain, and want to give up, they keep going! WOW!

I even had to give up my Junior Achievement class this spring. I taught my fall class, and had a lot of fun, but it never feels good to give something up. I was really looking forward to seeing the kids. I had 1st graders this year. Seems like missing work I am also missing out on a lot of other things I enjoy; my never-ending involvement in volunteering. I hope I can go back to work soon. I need some normalcy in my life, desperately!

So my life right now just seems like one big waiting game. I am waiting to go back to work, waiting to see what happens with my pregnancy, waiting to see my baby's beautiful face and hold him as close to my heart as possible. I am not sure I will be able to let go for his daddy to hold him. I am also waiting for small things, like our fence, so my son can run around in his own yard without worrying about the neighbors naughty dogs; and waiting for the weather to get a little nicer, possibly less windy, so we can enjoy more "firsts" with Paighton. I want to take him to the zoo and out on a lake and so many things.

Waiting is mundane. Waiting in doctor offices... more of those to come as well...